Unexperienced In Love

That’s me. I’m a 19 year old girl who has never been in a relationship before. And to be even more honest, I’ve never even had a real kiss before.
To say this in our society today is pretty abnormal. Most people my age have been in some sort of relationship.

A question often asked by family members, the hairdresser you go to or just random people is: “So, do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend?” And when you answer no, the follow-up is often: “Why?”
Well random person, I also don’t have a fucking clue, call me if you know the answer!

Because to be honest, I don’t know why I haven’t been in a relationship before. I mean, I’m not actively looking for a boyfriend. I kind of have this mind-set that it will happen someday and I shouldn’t force things. To be clear, I’m not at all lonely, but some questions do pop up from time to time.

Is it old school of me to want to meet someone in real life? Because I know that there are tons of dating apps like Tinder and some people actually find ‘the love of their life’ on there, but I’m not really interested in that. There are tons of perverts on those apps as well, so no thanks.

Another question that pops up: Are people just not interested in me? Or do I not see it when they send signs of interest? What kind of signs does someone even send you when they are interested? Because I don’t want to misinterpret kindness for flirting.

Or wait: Are my standards just too high when looking for a guy? Because I’ve had crushes before, not that many, but they never really evolved into anything more than just a crush.

It can sometimes be awkward when friends talk about certain experiences that they have had, and I’m just sitting there like ‘okay’. Or the thing that every ‘single’ friend has experienced: friends asking for love advice. We also don’t have a single clue of what we are doing, but for some reason people in a relationship think we know what to do better than they do.

The thing is: Yes, I do sometimes wonder what it would be like to have someone in my life like that. Someone that loves me (even when I act silly), wants to be with me, listens to all the nonsense I say,… And going on dates also seems super fun to me.

But I have the luck that I have amazing people surrounding me. Awesome friends, amazing family, … So I’m okay. And I know everyone will meet someone that they like, and some will even have the luck that that person likes them back. And some will live with that person happily, for a long time.

At least that’s what I believe.
So I will find someone. Maybe in a short period of time, maybe later.

So yeah, I’ve never been in a relationship before and I know I’m not the only one. And that’s okay.

Have a nice rest of your day/night!

Sarah

 

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